This one, I had written sometime in the beginning of last year in the middle of the night. I wanted to post this here for a long time now, but it didn't happen. Do read each and every word of the under carefully.. I hope this makes a positive difference in your behavior towards your mother..
Mother. That is one and only one being after Father that loves you unconditionally. But, the sadest thing about that fact is that we don't tend to realize it untill she passes away. That just a moment and it all comes to us. We suddenly realize it all. She is there a moment and the next, she is gone, lying lifeless in your arms. Just, just like that. And that is when you suddenly realize how important she had been to you. How much she loved you, cared for you more than anything. How everything she did and said only meant the best for you..
Remember how she eagerly waited for you to return from school and she had been there for you in any and every problem you had. The only person who would cry with you when you cried; who gave you the truest of the advices and all the support that you needed through anything.
Now, try to remember the way you answered to her when she enthusaistically asked you how the party you just returned from was?? The party, by the way, you could go to only because she convinced your father to let you go. Do you remember how she had still forgiven you? Infact, she had forgiven for all the mistakes that you've made, all the things you said, you did. That too knowing that you don't even realise that you have made a mistake, that you went wrong somewhere. You never really bothered too. You just kept disappointing her, leaving her broken by making the same mistakes again and again untill her soul left her body for good. She took it all. Just hoping that One day; One day you'd change, you'd understand, realize. She would tirelessly keep trying to show you the right way or the better way, lead you to a better tomorrow, to show you your mistakes so that you'd learn, be a better person. You just shouted at her for nagging. You just refused to understand it all and kept hurting her endlessly. You would never care much untill you were in deep shit and needed her favour. Then would you be the best daughter in the world untill, well, your work was done. The poor soul..
She would stay awake untill late with you when you were studying so that you don't feel lonely. She would get you hot cup of coffee, refill your glass of water when you were studying just so that thy time was not wasted. What did you do? Gave orders around. She took it all.
She would wake up early in the morning. Why? Because, you had told her to or You had school in the morning. She would try waking you up with all the love in the world, but you'd just keep testing her patience, call her names, and what not for she was Disturbing Thine sleep. Did you ever realize that she slept after clearing your and the rest of the family's mess and worke up before she started to wake you up just so that you are not late to the school? Most of the nights she didn't sleep at all for she was worrying about you. What did she get in return? Thine Sweet curses?
One day would come after a lot of days when she would have completely run out of patience and you would have crossed all your limits. She scolded the hell out of you. You got all the more aggressive and shouted back at her as if it were a shouting competition. To top that, you told her that SHE kept yelling at You all the time!! Is that fair? Eventually, her anger went down to null nad she again forgave you. The next day in school, you and your friends discuss how mean, rude and selfish parents are! Talking about selfishness, do you at all remember how you emotionally blackmailed her to get your way through, to convince your dad to let you go to those movies with friends? The words you gave to her about being serious in studies when you wanted a favour from her and then forget all about it after your purpose was served?
All she expected from you was you study for thyself and be bit more humane towards her. What did you give her? Selfishness, treatment as if she were your servant. The poor soul, alas, took it all. Blamed herself for that telling herself that probably she somewhere went wrong bringing you up.
Suddenly, that one moment comes. . The ultimate moment when she is finally relieved. She leaves the world and your eyes open. You realize. But it's too late; too late to mend; too late to make up for it.. And yet, from wherever she is, she just forgives you for that as well..
Salutation to all the suffering mothers of youngsters like me.
Amen.
